Thursday, October 30, 2008

Tags made Yesterday (10-29-08) On my Depression Day!

LiLA TOTD Challenge for Monday's 10-27-08 Tag

These where done by me on my very depressed day! What do you all think? If you want them tagged you can click the link with them. Thanks again for everything!! Enjoy!!! Hugs, KAT :OD

Sorry no post yesterday & maybe a short one today!

Well, I am really truly sorry about yesterday. I was so super DEPRESSED that I barely got on the computer and I did do up two tags though. I was really shocked that I did that. I really don't like them but I will show them in a little while. LOL!

I guess I am depressed alot because I am homebounded and in so much pain. But there is nothing really anyone can do for the pain but me to get the weight off and without being able to move around that is not going to happen. I don't eat much as it is and I don't drink anything but WATER and that is it. So, I guess it is just that I don't eat but maybe 1 or 2 meals a day and than I don't exercise but that is because of the pain. But life goes on and we still have to live even if it is from the pain or the weight. There is no need to cry over it but I do get in my moods that I get really depressed and I don't want to be around anyone. But yesterday I wanted to be around my hubby but I couldn't because he was busy working on a car and than he had to go and get supplies for that car. When I was able to go before I would go with him when he got supplies but now that I can't go out now I didn't get to go with him. So, I have been really lonely alot lately. Don't get me wrong I have my mom and stepfather and uncle that live with us but it is not being able to go out and be around other people and especially being around my hubby. It seems like he is always working. He is at work tonight on his day off. We didn't get to spend another week together and this is going on 2 months now. So, that is another reason I am really depressed. It seems like we never see each other but when we got bed and that is no more than 1 hour at the most.

So, I guess it is just me talking a bunch of stuff because most of the time I know it is just me. Or that is what I am told all the time.

I just needed to put this out and all just need to vent. Well, I guess I will for now and go and upload the tags I did yesterday. It took me a few hours just to get 2 tags done and usually it don't take me 15 mins to do a tag. LOL! So, I guess I was really down yesterday. I had a really bad panic attack too yesterday. I couldn't stop crying yesterday and my pain levels were really high like today. But I know why cry over it and all because there isn't anything anyone can do.

Well, I guess I will let you all go and take care and talk to you soon. God bless everyone!! Many hugs and love, KAT :OD

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Update on Stepmom -- What happen last night & today!

Well, most of you know by now my stepmom has had to have 3 tumors removed from her throat/thyroid area. Well, last night I was talking with my dad and he said that he had to take my stepmom to the doctor's today because her throat area on her neck was swelling up. And it looked like there was blood filling up in there. She tried to take a picture and send it to me. I hope I can get it posted on here.. Well, it post above instead of down here. LOL! But anyway you can see what I am talking about. Well, she went to the doctor today and he said that this is normal because it is the only place the blood can go is down there. I am WHAT how is that? I just don't understand it. She has to go back on Friday or one day this next week. I can't remember what may dad told me today. The reason I was not remembering is because there has been so much going on here today. Sorry picture is not that great but thought I would show you what she sent to me.

My uncle had to go the VA for his renal and diabetes check up. They have changed him all up on his medicines again and so now I have to help him out more with that and we have to record his readings for his diabetes again. This is so much a pain in the butt sometimes. He just turned 61 yrs old and he lives with us and I have to help him out with his medicines because if not he will not either take them or he will take too much. He did that once last week and we had to call the ambulance on him because his blood sugar dropped and went below 40. Where it is suppose to be at least 90 or 120. So, they had to give him a lot of candy, juice and gel sugar and it still only brought it back up to 72. He was like almost into a coma state. So, we have to keep an eye on him at all times. I think he maybe getting Dementia or Alzheimer's. I don't know but that is what I think is going to be happening. His mother had Dementia and was getting Alzheimer's herself before she passed away. So, it could be but I will watch him and take care of him the best that me and my mom know how too.
Well, I guess I will go for now and get ready to spend a little time with my hubby for a change after he gets out of the shower. He stinks so bad that I made he get into the shower because he has been working on cars all day and stinks like grease and oils. Thanks again for taking the time to read and I will talk to you soon. God bless and many hugs, support, prayers and lots of love, KAT :OD

Today has been a very weird day all the way around!

If you want this tag it was designed by me just click HERE and it will send me an email and just tell me what you want on it and I will send it back to you ASAP. Thank you so much!!!

Well, today has been a very weird day today. There has been so much SADNESS going on in the world and in my life. I can't believe how much has been going on in this life. What is the world coming too I ask everyday.

I was watching Oprah today and seen the most saddest thing I have ever seen. It was called 99 Balloons. You can watch it here... and it is so sad and you will need a lot of tissues for watching this 6 minute video.

Today on Oprah was about young kids who inspire. It was so sad and even Oprah and Celine were in tears over this video too. It is so amazing how much little children go through and they suffer so much before they are even an adult. This just makes my life feel so not important and makes me feel like a fool because they go through so much and yet they can't say how much pain they have to go through. It makes my pain feel so little.

I still can't believe what happen to Jennifer Hudson's Nephew Julian King. That is totally saddens me so much and just to think about so many other little children who get killed over evil adults that they feel they need to take a life. It is horrible and I just can't understand why so many have to die so young. If it is not one it is 100 and this will keep going on and on in our lives because we can't do anything to prevent it from happening.

Well, I guess this is all for me now I will be back in a few to update on my Stepmom she has something that come up last night and had to go to the doctor today. Well, take care and talk to you soon. God bless and many hugs, support, prayers and lots of love, KAT :OD

Monday, October 27, 2008

Sad & Depressed Monday Evening!

Tag designed by Me and if you want it tagged just email me or click here... You're Always On My Mind Tag

Well, here it is late Monday Evening and I am just getting on the computer. Boy where did the day go??? I have not been feeling well again today don't know what is going on with me. I was going to get on the computer earlier today but instead I ended up falling asleep on the sofa watching a movie on Lifetime TV. I guess that movie was too good that it actually put me to sleep unless it was because I took some Tylenol and all for the pain. We had a cold front come in today and it got cold and when it gets cold I start to hurt really bad.

Did you all do anything good for the first day of the week?

I was watching the News tonight and it is really sad about Jennifer Hudson's 7 yr old Nephew Julian. What gets into people's heads to make them go on a killing spree?? Like a little 7 yr old kid can do anything to an ADULT it just makes me so mad and it really upsets me so much that this can happen to a young person like this. Is anyone keeping up with this story? I was wondering why Jennifer's mom and brother were shot? What was it over? I heard it was to do with domestic abuse or something. Is this true? I know Jennifer Hudson has to be really upset over this especially when her career is just getting to take off the ground. Do you all know if she was very close to her mom and brother? I know so many questions. LOL!

Sometimes I don't know what makes someone want to kill. How do they actually shoot or stab someone. You really have to be down and out to really do this to another living thing. I hate to even kill a fly or a bug. It is just not right and I don't understand what brings a person to this. Just like so many people have said to me because of me being ill and all. They don't know how they would live with what I have for as long as I have done it because they would have killed themselves by now. I always answer to them with this...

"Why kill yourself? What is that going to solve? You will leave your loved ones and than you will not be able to go to heaven by doing this. Do you think by killing yourself that it is going to make things right or better? No because it is not."

It really upsets me that people would think because of the pain I am in that they would need to kill themselves because they could not put up with the pain and infections and stuff I have been through. But why do that because there are so many other people in this world that are more WORSE than I am and do you see them killing themselves? NO I answer!! So, why would you want to do it. They must have really low self esteem or low pain tolerance or something. It doesn't make any sense to me. Does it to you all?

Again I am sorry for not getting online sooner and doing this but I just have not had the strength to do anything lately. Maybe because I have been depressed too. There are so many things going on in my life right now. Money is the biggest thing of all evil here. There is not enough coming in and too much going out. With the economy the way it is now days I just don't know how anyone is making it. It is not right and maybe sometime soon the world and all of us can come together and get this straightened out. I am praying and hoping for that.

Well, I guess I will go for now and all hubby is just getting home and he is hungry. LOL! Well, you all have a great and blessed day and I will talk to you again tomorrow I am hoping. Hubby is home tomorrow but he has to work on his side job for Tomorrow, Wednesday and Thursday. I don't know if I will get any alone time with him again this week. Very sad over that because we have not had alone time together except for when we go to bed and that is no longer than an hour a day in over a month or better. Really getting lonely here.

Well, you all be good and don't get into any trouble now. Be nice and make sure you always tell your loved ones that you really love with all your heart and soul and give them all big hugs and kisses from you and from me. God bless you always and forever!! With all my love, support, prayers and hugs to your family from mine, KAT :OD

Sunday, October 26, 2008

What to talk about today (Sunday) Evening?

Made by Me and if you want it tagged just email me or click here... Memories TAG

Well, what to talk about today? I don't have much to say because of the pain I am in but I do have to tell you about my stepmother. My real dad was here today to visit me and all. He was telling me she was home resting but she is in a lot of pain now because of not having any pain pills. So, he stayed here for about 2 hours today to let her rest and get some sleep she really needs because she has been hovering over him like nothing is wrong with her and trying to do stuff she is not suppose to be doing. She is a what do you call them people that has to be in control all the time and doing stuff herself because no one can do it right but her? So that is why he left for a little while. They have their good and bad days together. But that is with any couple though. LOL!

Me and my dad had a good time this afternoon because we talked about all the old times and my dad was finally my dad for once. It was really great to see him in a good mood. Usually me and my dad don't get along because we always butt heads because we both are too much alike each other. So, it was good to be able to talk about memories and the best including the good and the bad. LOL! But he will always be hyper as ever. I don't know how he can be so hyper as he is. Boy he can get really loud too and after he left I had to take some tylenol for my headache from him getting so loud. I think he is getting something wrong with his hearing because he does talk too loud I think.

Also, while I was on the computer today I fixed up a little something with me and Rob on it for my Profile. Let me know what you all think about it. I usually do not put my picture on the internet but I think it is time to do that. LOL! I know I am very UGLY and very FAT so please don't comment on that. I know what I am and I can't do anything about it right now until I can get my illness under control. Thank you very much for taking the time to look over everything and for keeping up with all my talking. LOL! I know at times I can go on and on. LOL! Well, I hope you like some of the tags I am putting on here each time I post because this is stuff I have made or stuff I really enjoy!!

Well, I guess am going to make it short tonight. I think I will go and watch some TV because Extreme Home Makeover is on and than Cold Case is on and than my favorite show is Army Wives at 10pm eastern time. Boy do I love that. LOL! I can't wait and I am so upset because it is only 1 episode away from the season finale. I don't know what I will do without my Army Wives fix every Sunday. LOL! Well, take care everyone and have a great and blessed evening!! God bless you all and talk to you soon!! Many hugs and lots of love, KAT :OD

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Off to bed now & see you all tomorrow

Well, I guess it is time for me to get ready for bed. Hubby is on his way home from work and it is around 11pm here on the eastern coast. LOL! I know I am a party pooper. LOL! I have to go to bed early because if not I don't get the rest I need for hubby to help me to get out of the bed in the mornings because I don't have anyone else to help me once he is gone to work. He has to work the following schedules normally.

Fridays -- 11 am until 9:30 pm
Saturdays -- 12 pm until 10:30 pm
Sundays -- 10:30 am until 9 pm
Mondays -- 10:30 am until 9 pm

So you see if I don't get up with him because he always has to leave at least 30 minutes or more before he goes to work. So, if I don't get up with him when he leaves I would not be able to get up the rest of the day because of the way our bed is and how bad my legs are. Like I said I am totally homebound and I do have a wheelchair but I can't use it in my home because there is just NOT enough room at all for it. My home is not that big for this electric wheelchair at all.

I wish sometimes I could get a Home MakeOver so I could be able to go out and than be able to help out in the house and be able to move around in the house too. I can't get out of the home because I do need the wheelchair and right now because I don't have the room to use it I don't and I have to depend on a cane which is not working right now because of how bad my knee is and all. Oh well that will never happen so I guess the next best thing is to try to get better and lose alot of weight. LOL! Oh well maybe that will not happen either. Who knows anymore.

Well, take care and talk to you all again tomorrow or Monday at the latest okay. Be good and don't do anything I wouldn't do. LOL! Happy Sunday Everyone!!! God bless and many hugs, KAT :OD

Blinkie Mania Tags - Animated & Non Animated

Suppose to be animated but don't know why it is not. Please help me out here?????

Here are the two tags I did yesterday and if you would like them tagged let me know and I will do them for you all. Just either post through the COMMENTS section or use this link...

Just a little Chat today - Cuz in a lot of Pain!

Well, I am sorry I have not been online much today but I have been under the weather because one it is pouring outside. I can't believe how hard it is raining and than it started to lightning and thunder. My poor dogs are so scared of thunder and lightning. LOL! Do you all have any dogs that are like that?

Well, No news on my stepmom today except my dad said she is sleeping and is hurting in the throat pretty bad but that is I am taking from what she ate for dinner last night. But my dad is telling me that the doctor didn't give her an pain meds to come home with so that maybe one of the reasons as well. So she is just sleeping most of the day and I have not talked to her personally since the other night when she was in the hospital. I just don't understand why my dad would take and get her Chinese Food last night for dinner and she got the hardest food that you can get which was Shrimp Fried Rice and Fried Chicken Wings. It just don't make NO sense at all.

What have you all been doing today? Nothing for me but laying back on the sofa most of the day because of the pain I have been in with my legs and knees. My hubby changed my wrapping on my bad leg last night and when he did he hurt my knee even more. It wasn't his fault though when he went to lift my leg up it just popped again. He didn't do anything but lift it up.

I am really happy that my leg is healing up pretty good since I had the open wounds on it so hopefully that will be able to take the bandages and wrap off it soon but I am very doubtful because whenever I do it just breaks back open everytime within a week. My skin on my legs are too sensitive and very weak so they just break back open everytime. Oh if you don't know I have what is called "PRIMARY LYMPHEDEMA" in both of my legs. It is where you lymph nodes are no longer working and they hold in the lymphatic fluid in my legs and they swell up. I am not sure what the correct term it is but that is what I know off hand without looking it up on the computer. LOL!

Maybe someday I will be brave enough and show you all my legs and what I have to go through it is not a very pretty picture at all. But that is something I have to decide if I want to share on the blog. LOL!
Also, if you all didn't see what I make yesterday on the LiLA group on AOL I will set it up on here so if you want to have it you can snag it or I can tag it for you. I will do that on the next post I do for here tonight. OK! I am sorry I didn't do a post last night but I got too involved in making that Blinkie Mania Tag for Halloween and it has a Mummy on it. I did make one that is non animated as well. Maybe I will put both of them on there for you all.

My hubby just called me from work and he said that he has gotten so WET from all the RAIN we have had all day. He is a Valet Driver for the local Slot place we have. He makes only $8 an hour and tips but the tips can range from $20 to $200 a day which he has not seen anything over $100 in a long time per day. Yesterday because he went to the funeral and all of his Co-Worker he only brought home with him was $20. And he worked a 6 hours shift compared to his 10 hours he usually works everyday.

Well, he was telling me that the Funeral he went to yesterday was really weird and different compared to the ones he normally goes too. He said there was NO Body, NO Pictures and NO Flowers. There was a priest, people who talked about his co-worker and than the family and all. But he said it was totally different and it went really fast. You should see the Memorial Card they are suppose to get it is no bigger than a half of a post card in size and than it is only a little something on one side and than a picture on the front and that is it. I don't know if they cremated him or what it was really strange. LOL!

Well, I guess I will go for now but I hope everyone has been having a great and blessed day. Hopefully your Sunday will be better than your Saturday or I hope it is for me and everyone here in Delaware.

Got a question for you all how come I have so much trouble with this blog doing what I want it to do? I either get double or triple spaces between paragraphs or I can't get my pictures to work. It is just one thing after another. Do you all have all these blog issues as well? Please help me on this. Maybe I am doing something wrong. Well, I guess I am going to go and sorry my picture is not animated it is suppose to be a picture of RAIN but that is not working. LOL! Take care and talk to you all soon. Much love, support, prayers and love, KAT :OD

Friday, October 24, 2008

Drinking from my saucer
(A very spiritual & true poem a Friend Sent to me today & so I had to share!)

I've never made a fortune, and it's probably too late now. But I don't worry about that much, I'm happy anyhow And as I go along life's way, I'm reaping better than I sowed. I'm drinking from my saucer, 'Cause my cup has overflowed.

Haven't got a lot of riches, and sometimes the going's tough But I've got loving ones all around me, and that makes me rich enough. I thank GOD for his Blessings, and the Mercies HE's bestowed. I'm drinking from my saucer, 'Cause my cup has overflowed.

I remember times when things went wrong, My faith wore somewhat thin. But all at once the dark clouds broke, and the sun peeped through again. So LORD, help me not to gripe, about the tough rows I have hoed. I'm drinking from my saucer, 'Cause my cup has overflowed.

If GOD gives me strength and courage, When the way grows steep and rough. I'll not ask for other blessings, I'm already Blessed enough.

And may I never be too busy, to help others bear their loads.. Then I'll keep drinking from my saucer, 'Cause my cup has overflowed. When I think of how many people in this world have it worse than I do, I realize just how BLESSED WE really are.

Friday's Update on Stepmom

Well, I got a call this morning around 9:30am from my dad. They were letting my stepmom out of the hospital at that time. Than they had to go to the pharmacy because they have her on an antibiotics to make sure that she don't get an infection. So, that is really good on that. I am so happy she is getting to come home today but really I feel they should have kept her longer that was major surgery. But you know how doctors and hospitals are now days and plus there are more infections in the hospital than anyone know. Believe me you I know that first hand. Over 7 yrs ago I got MRSA from being in the hospital and almost died. So, I believe that if you don't really need to be in the hospital than don't go and stay. LOL!

I will be back later on and update you more on me and what is going on with me today. I am not really feeling too well and getting a really slow start on everything. LOL! Thanks again for taking the time to read this. You all be good and have a very blessed Friday!! Many hugs and love, KAT :OD

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Update on Stepmom!!!

Thank you all very much for being the Guardian Angels that you are, because I just got the call from my dad and my stepmother is out of the surgery and in her own room resting. Everything went well the doctor said they took out the 3 tumors and they just have to wait and see if it is cancerous or not. That may take up to 2 weeks to find out. My stepmother will be able to come home tomorrow sometime if everything goes right for the next 24 hours. So, keep the prayers coming.

My dad said she can talk a little bit much it is like a whisper right now. He didn't tell me how bad she was cut and if anything was disfigured because he sounded like he was very tired or he may have been asleep. But who knows I am just very thankful that she is doing okay. Thank you all for everything. You all have been very great to me during all this.

If I hear anything else I will be sure to update you all. Thanks again for everything and you all have a great and blessed night. I will be signing off for a while because this blog got me upset because I have been trying to get this header on here for over 2 hours and it was not allowing me. I guess they were having issues because I was not able to add a post for the past 30 minutes on here. LOL! SO, maybe that was what was wrong with why I couldn't post the header but now I got it on there until I can get a new template.

Do you all know of any place I can get a new template from or do you all know how to do the template? Just wondering because I would love to learn how to do them. Thanks a million!!! Many hugs and support, love and prayers, KAT :OD

No News yet from Dad about Stepmother

Well, I have not heard anything as of yet from my Dad. I have tried to call him on his cellphone but with no luck in getting him. Hopefully he will call me soon as I am getting really worried here. They were suppose to be done at 1pm and here it is 2:51pm eastern time here. So, I am really worried now but than again it could have been set behind because of like her last surgery was running behind. So, maybe that is what is going on.

I just wanted to send out a little something to let you all know that I really do appreciate all the love, support, prayers and thoughtfulness that has been coming to me from you all at LiLA!!! It really means the world to me to know how much you all actually do care about me and my family!!

As soon as I hear anything else I will let you all know. Thanks again for everything. Take care and talk to you soon. God bless and much love, support, prayers, and hugs, KAT :OD

Sorry Last Post 4 Tonight -- Very Sad News!

Don't know who made this last one but thank you Roxy for the top one!! Sorry I can't get them to change areas. LOL!

Well, this is going to be the last past I make tonight but I thought I would let everyone know the bad news we just got tonight. One of my hubby's co-workers just passed away from Cancer. He was only in his 60's. Rob (Hubby) had been friends with him now over 2 yrs and they got really close because he worked with him everyday.

This is really sad and my hubby is really upset over this. I know he is going to try to go to the funeral and all. Just to give the family the support and prayers.

Just thought you all should know because you all have been here through all this and have been here listening. Boy can I have some ups and downs in my life. Today has been one of those days I guess.

Also, tomorrow 10/23/08 is my Uncle who lives with me his BIRTHDAY so I don't know if I will be online much okay so don't be scared if you don't see me wrote anything. LOL! But I will try to be on to let you all know about my Stepmother okay. Take care you all and please make sure to give them hugs to all the loved ones and from me. OK!

God bless and many hugs and love, KAT :OD

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

WOW!! I am so happy & excited!!!

Emmi from LiLA told me she made this for me and so I want to give her credit!!! Thank you Emmi because I just love this TAG!!!

WOW!!! You all truly have made my day today by joining my blog. I really do know now who all are my friends and who will be there to help me if I am down and out. This really means so much from my heart that you did this.

If you all will please take a few minutes today before you go to bed. Please go and give your loved one or your child a hug and a kiss and tell them how much you love them and how much they mean to you. Because for you never know what tomorrow may bring. As I want to send to you all my (((LOVE))) and my (((HUGS))) and my (((KISSES))) and my (((SUPPORT))) and all my (((PRAYERS))) go out to you and all your families. You really do know how much you all mean to me and you will always be in my heart forever!!!!

Also, if you will say a Prayer for my Stepmother Linda Miller tonight she goes in at 8am in the morning to the hospital and the surgery is at 10am and they should be done by 1pm and as soon as I know anything I will let you all know. I will do a post here okay. Please let this work out for her because she is really scared and they said that it could disfigure her face if it is not done right. So, please make sure that doesn't happen too.

Well, I have some mail to check and all before I go to bed tonight and hopefully you all will have a great and blessed evening!!! Know I am always here for everyone and take care of yourselves. Take care and talk to you soon. Have a great Thursday!!!
Many hugs and love, KAT :OD

Today is a sad day for me & my family!

Tag made by Roxy aka Shelly (Thanks for this beautiful tag!)

Today is a sad day because 1 yr today is the day that my best friend passed on to Heaven to be with God. She was only 37 yrs old when she passed away. Her name was Belinda Fulmer and we had been friends online for over 10 yrs and we lived miles away from each other. Yet it seemed like sisters and that we had known each other for eternity. But yet we had never seen each other in our whole time we known each other we still stay very close and talked almost everyday until she got really bad off.

So, today out of the blue I got a call from her husband. He was really upset and need someone to talk too because he don't really have many friends and his family is all gone except for his stepmother and he don't get to see her that much. So, we talked for over an hour and we cried and than we laughed about all the good times we had with Belinda.

Than I found out today too that my stepmother is going to have to go and have surgery tomorrow 10/23/08 on removal of 3 tumors in her throat / thyroid area. They don't know if they are cancerous or not but they are going in to remove them. She has just gotten done from having surgery on her foot where they have to repair it that had a hole in there and they had to pack it with bone marrow. Than they had to remove the tumor in it as well. Thank goodness it was not cancerous at all. She is still healing from it and had gotten an infection from that and just got off the antibiotics like less than 2 weeks ago and now is having to go into surgery on this other tomorrow. I really have been feeling bad about this surgery and don't know why.

So, as you can tell today has been really one of those days and it don't look like it is going to get any better because I am still in a lot of pain from where I popped my bad leg's knee out and have not been able to bare any weight on it for the past 3 days. I don't know what is going on with here lately. I am only 34 yrs old and feel like I am a 134 yrs old. LOL!

Well, I will let you go for now and talk to you soon again! Love you always and forever everyone!! Live today to its fullest because you never know what tomorrow will bring.
God bless and many hugs, KAT